Productivity, Caffeine, and Jesus in the Chaos

img_4631I feel as though my life has just been a whirlwind the last threeish weeks. I have been going and going, trying to make routine with a new semester, adding new things to my schedule, and just reflect on the what God has been teaching me and the ways He has been working. In all this craziness I have not had a new post in a couple weeks, the longest ever since starting this blog. And it has been weighing on me because I feel like I have so much to share with you all, so much God wants to share through me, at the same time I really feel the pull for this blog not to consume me or for it to become a priority over other things in my life, that these last couple weeks I have been putting ahead of the blog.

Right now I am sitting at a coffee shop with a couple beautiful friends from church and we are trying to be productive, while using caffeine to help us through, and having deep talks about Jesus in between. And this has basically described my January so far, and definitely this past weekend.

At the beginning of the new year I went to Cross Conference in Louisville, Kentucky with my church. And God worked in my heart so much toward the mission we are all called to as Christians. As John Piper put it, “There are three types of Christians; goers, senders, and those who are disobedient”. I can’t wait to share more with you all, about how God worked wonders in my heart over that weekend in Louisville.

That weekend though was so busy that I just did not get a lot of time to reflect on all the stuff I learned, and everything that God was showing me And I wanted to take that time, but as soon as we got back school started. And I knew the time was there to focus back on school but I also knew that I needed to spend more time with the Lord than I had been. And so I through myself into that while completing the basic minimum for school, and doing all the other things I had planned and the random things that came up. Coffee dates, interviews, and just other things; all good but I just felt life was going on around me and it was going so fast that I couldn’t take it all in because I was still reflecting back.

This week even with other things added in: small group, college ministry, more schoolwork, a class at church, and coffee dates. I feel as though God has finally given me the grace to see how He is working in my life. He gave me all these things so I would pause and not just throw another thing out here. He wanted me to see how He has literally placed every aspect of every day of every hour of every week of my life in the right spot and I am there for His purpose and not my own. God wanted me to see that He was above everything. I just need to have open hands to Him. He gave me time to catch up this weekend, and He also finally gave me the words I need to write to you all.

The things in my life all have a purpose for Him, but without true, personal time with God I can’t do those things, and I won’t be doing them for the right purpose. God knows the plans He has for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us, plans to give us a hope and a future, and plans that He is using to bring Himself glory. Not to bring us glory. (Jere 29:11)

I am sorry I haven’t been able to post. But, at the same time God used that time for me to focus on Him, and not myself. To focus on Him, and the actual physical people around me. To build relationships with my wonderful community, my family, and my local church family. He has filled me up beyond measure, so that I can pour Him out into others and still be sustained more than I can imagine by Him. I pray that the focus continues to be on Him, this blog can only happen because of Him giving me the opportunity, so I pray that this opportunity grows in the way He wants and lasts as long as He desires.

So even though life seems to be going faster than I can keep up or understand, God gives us grace to catch up and slow down and rest in and with Him, to see the beauty of how He is moving in our lives, and working in every detail and aspect of what can seem like chaos around us.  See the blessing of the time to catch up, to see God in how His glory has  made every detail and ounce of stress a part of where you are supposed to be.



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