I have decided to run a half marathon…and even I think that I am crazy sometimes! With about three months left to train until race day, I think more with each passing day that I am not going to make to that finish line, at least in the time I want to or in the way I want to.
To give a little back story, one year I ran a lot and really got into it. (Enjoying running is not my problem, I really do love it). But, I started to be in pain when I ran. My legs were burning like they were on fire when I ran or walked and definitely when I did long distance. At first the doctors treated it as a stress fracture and then we realized it wasn’t that but compartment syndrome, which is a compression of the nerve. So about two years ago I had bilateral leg surgery to release both of my nerves. And it has been a slow process back. (If you want more of the story check out my running journey on the blog). I have slowly tried to get back into running, but over time my mind has played trick on me that my body just can’t do it. And that is totally a lie. I am healed, it might take my body some hard work to readjust but it can, it can do it.
The thing with the race though is I can’t put where I am now in my training and what my body is accomplishing now in my mind as where I will be in 3 months from now. I will be better everyday I train. I can go further or faster or harder or all of those more than I did the day before. It is not about disappointing myself at where I am at not, imaging where I would be if nothing changed. It is also not comparing myself to the ultra marathoner, the consistent long distance runner who hasn’t had an injury, the multiple half marathoner, or my best friend who has a different pace than me.
The reasons why this is true. God made each of us different, so we will do things in unique ways (case and point not everyone enjoys running or feels called to do it to treat their body like a temple, accomplish things for Gods glory, or to spend time with Him). Each day I will get better and stronger, it is not about putting pressure on where I am at now, it is enjoy the present and just continuing to go out there and go a little bit longer or faster than I did the last time. It is also about leaning on the Lord and trusting that I am doing this for a reason and what better way to show His glory than one of the ways He has helped physical healed me and made me stronger ! The goal now is just to keep going the next day and being better the next day.